Friday, September 30, 2005

Stressed to the Max!

I know, not good for fertility, but can't be helped. We've got a lot going on in our little world. So to give you an update on what I've been up to here's a strange stream of consiousness. Saturday, we went to my boss's house and I bought a relatively new spare washer and dryer from him. Mt. Washmore began to come tumbling down after my DH and BIL hooked it up that afternoon. Sunday, went to in-laws to see the new baby. He is pretty cute. And to pick up my munchkin who had been spoiled by her grandparents for a week! Monday and Tuesday, Tom and I were both supposed to be off work, so he could finish the taping and spackling of the drywall in the soon-to-be-finished basement. I was to finish painting and get caught up on assorted appointments we needed to take care of (calling an installer for the basement carpeting we picked out, making appt to order blinds for the front rooms of the current house, rescheduling appt with the landscaper for the new house, calling to schedule DD's birthday party at the local ice skating rink, this list goes on forever!) Anyway, Tom ended up working both days, for something new for one boss, while he also needed to get budgets together for the other boss, and homework to get done for school. I'm pleased to say I got caught up on a lot of stuff at home, including our house being cleaner than it's been in a long while (thank you, Flylady!). Wednesday, we both officially went back to work, but we had to leave early to sign a Change Order at the new house to move the fireplace in the family room to a new wall (cause it makes more sense there), get rid of a strange extra closet in the master bedroom and make it a sitting area for the guest room (it has a window!), and move the door for the guest room closet. After the Change Order signing, we had to go order those blinds I made the appt for. Thursday (yesterday), Tom was out of town for work; he took the train to NYC and from there White Plains. I worked and left on time to go procure ourselves some much needed groceries. Today I'm trying to leave a little early as I'm taking Phoebe to get a practice dress for ice skating as I promised. She's really been doing a great job in class and enjoys it immensely. We're discussing private lessons too, but I don't want to make it too serious for her unless she wants it to be. I'll also be going to NJ tonight to pick up one of my SILs to come and stay with us for the weekend/or the week, we haven't decided which yet. Tom's in classes until Saturday evening.

Let's hope next week is a little quieter!!!

Monday, September 26, 2005

Not This Month - Probably a Good Thing

I had my first 28-day cycle since I was in my 20s! Woo hoo! BTW, this means AF came on Sunday. I say it's probably a good thing since I have so much stuff to do, I probably shouldn't be in the "I'm so tired phase" I get for the whole first trimester. I'm going to take the day off today, take Phoebe to school and get some more stuff done. The good news is that I got a washer and dryer from my boss. They had just moved and ended up with two sets. So my washing machine issues are over. No second trip to the laundromat for me, thank God.

Not to bore anyone, but I think my blog over the next few weeks is mostly going to be about the things I have to get done around here. Not much to report on the infertility front this month. I'll still be doing my charting though and we'll see how it goes.

Thursday, September 22, 2005

Reply Hazy. Try Again Later

Actually, it wasn't even hazy, but non-existant. At 11 DPO today, it's still pretty early. I don't think I'm going to try again until Sunday morning if my temps stay relatively high. My almost tri-phastic chart let me down the immediate next day.

So of course on top of looking for phantom pregnancy symptoms, I'm also looking for my usual PMS symptoms. You all know how it is.

Wednesday, September 21, 2005

Testing Warning

OK, all. I'm coming clean now. I'll be doing the ol' POAS tomorrow AM. I'll be 11 DPO. So while I'm doing a prayer to all creation tonight, please do the same, or at least keep all your bits crossed for me.

Usually I'm not an early tester, but I'm telling myself to do this as I have an acupuncture appointment tomorrow and I'd like to be able to give her good news if I can. Am I fooling anyone here? Really I'm just getting really impatient at this point and I'd like to have good news myself as early as possible.

Of course I'm noticing every possible phantom pregnancy symptom: being tired, is my tummy upset?, my gums were bleeding when I flossed my teeth. Yup, I'm going certifiable.

Monday, September 19, 2005

Flash Has Arrived!

Dylan Thomas (aka Flash), my new nephew, was born via cesearean section on Saturday afternoon. He was 8 lbs 7 oz and 20 1/2 inches long. Both Mom (my SIL) and baby are doing well.

I went and stayed overnight at the hospital with the rest of the family on Friday night after her water broke at 8 PM, but quite a few of us left on Saturday morning as she was only at 2 cm dilated by 10 AM. Many went back in time, but I waited for Tom to come back from school later in the afternoon so we would only have one car in NJ.

On other news, the Melting Pot was awesome. Had one fantastic glass of white wine (had to drive to NJ to take Phoebe to her cousin's anyway and always hold out hope to be PG) and the food was wonderful! We didn't have dessert as we were so full already! Had Wisconsin cheese fondue to start, mixed green salad with walnut raspberry vinegrette dressing, and then the coq a vin fondue with surf n turf and the regular combination platter.

Had a good (quiet) cry on the way driving to NJ. Couldn't help it. It made me feel a lot better though. And music helps your child in the backseat not know that mommy is upset about anything. I tried to relax, but when I did, it just made it all come out.

I saw a hopeful sign this morning. My temp jumped really high. The first time it's ever been over 98.6 for a BBT. Could this be the triphastic temperature chart I've been looking for all my life!!!! I'll let you know if it continues tomorrow. If it keeps it up, I'll try to POAS on Thursday morning as I have an acupuncture meeting then. That would make Naixin's day! Mine as well.

Friday, September 16, 2005

Pity Party Over

For anyone who might read the last post and worry about me. I'm OK. The pity party is officially over. My friend Suzy invited Phoebe and I out to dinner tonight with her DH and 2 kids (teenagers, the older is our babysitter). We're going to the Melting Pot. It's a fondue restaurant, and none of us have ever been there before. When she said she'd like to try it I thought it would be great for Phoebe, what 4-year-old doesn't like to play with sticks and dip their food?

After that I'm taking Phoebe to her grandparents and will see SIL#1 who is due to have her baby today. I'm truly happy for her and I know our time will come.

Everyone have a great weekend!

Pity Party

I'm having a rough day today. I swear this is the worst two-week wait ever! I'm surrounded by PG women, my SIL is due to have her baby today, and I feel like I want to curl up in fetal position and have a good cry. Then there's the other part of me that wants to smack myself and say, "Snap out of it!" a la Cher in Moonstruck. Maybe I'll feel better just typing this. I hope so, because then there's the guilt factor in my brain saying that this mood is not conducive to me having a good outcome this month. Like whether or not I have a good cry is going to get me knocked up.

I took the day off work yesterday and got a lot of personal errands done, which I so needed to do. Here's my day yesterday:
  • Took Phoebe to school.
  • Went to Starbucks as I had time before my acupuncture appt and went over my to do list and read some personal emails on my Treo cell phone.
  • Went to acupuncture appointment. Love it there. Even the smell relaxes me.
  • Went home, had lunch. Straightened up a bit.
  • Took Corona to 1-year vet appt (even remembered to collect fresh stool sample before we left!)
  • Took recycling with dog before appt. (Recycling is voluntary in DE. Did I say I can't wait to move to PA in March?)
  • Brought Corona home, went to laundromat (my washer died last week). Did five loads of laundry.
  • Brought home wet clothes and started up dryer.
  • Made home-made whole wheat pizza dough for dinner. Let rise
  • Picked up Phoebe from school. Stopped at pet store for new collar for dog.
  • Punched down pizza dough. Took DD for bike ride with dog in tow on new collar (which kept her from pulling me down street. Vet said she needs more exercise).
  • Made cheese pizza and salad for dinner.
  • Put all clothes away, now that drying cycles are done.
  • Got Phoebe ready for bed.
  • Made phone calls to friends to have plans on Saturday night.
  • Watched episode of "Real World Austin" on Demand.
  • Helped DH print out a document for school.
  • Went to bed and slept hard.

Wow! I do feel better. No wonder I feel like shit today. I used all my energy yesterday. I think I just need to continue my good work and go through my work and personal To Do lists and knock this shit off, right? I know it's also really hard on me trying to get things done around the house to get it on the market, things to deal with the builder of the new house, running day-to-day life doing more than I ever did, because not only is Tom traveling a lot for work, but he's either in school or doing school work. Only 20 more months.... I know it'll be worth it.

Monday, September 12, 2005

Being Hopeful

The other shoe dropped this morning. My friend who sits next to me is pregnant with her second child. She found out over the weekend. She got pregnant with her first when I was seeing the RE. We were doing our 2nd round of IVF when she had her baby. It was an oops baby. Not that her DD was unwanted though, she really is the cutest little baby. I showed the appropriate amount of happiness for her and promised not to tell anyone (but I will tell DH tonight, but that doesn't count). She's not one of those naive women that will announce to the world the instant she has a positive POAS. She's told some of her family members and me. We tell each other this stuff and she knows what I'm going through, so she's very sensitive to that. So all in all, I'm happy for her.

In other events, I need to post some pics of the building of the new house. They framed the rear walkout area of the basement and are starting to put in the support beams in the basement to support the top structure. V exciting!

We got the drywall up in the basement of our current house. Tom's brother, wife, and two kids came by on Saturday so his brother could help bring the sheetrock to the house in his truck and start getting it all up. They did about 85% of the hanging. I helped Tom with the remaining 15% and some electrical work on Sunday. It was some of the more intracate work, so we worked from 9 AM to 5 PM, ouch! On Saturday, when "the boys" were working in the basement, I painted the trim in the kitchen while SIL was getting ready for the class she teaches at the local college. The kids were playing C-section. Ha ha. Not that I've ever had one, but SIL had them for both kids. She's the one that's 6 weeks along with her third and has told everyone. I guess she explained C-sections to her kids. It was funny to listen to. Later I talked to Phoebe a little more about having babies and told her I didn't have an operation to have her.

"Well, how did I come out?"

"You came out my vagina."

"Ewwww, I came out your butt!"

"Not quite. When you're older I'll let you watch it on videotape if you want."

I'm curious to know what she might end up saying at school. Hope I don't get any strange notes from the teacher about new games Phoebe is teaching her classmates in Home Living (this is the area of toys for playing house).

On another note, Phoebe was an angel on Sunday while we were working in the basement. She had a Pajama Day until we got dressed to look at the new house at 5 PM, worked on some arts and crafts in the living room while watching cartoons. She made herself a calendar to be just like me. Is that too cute or what?

Almost forgot about today's title. We're very hopeful this month. I ovulated on Day 15 this month. This is much better than my usual Day 12. Tom's been home, so we've been having lots of "quality time." The two-week wait starts today. Wish us luck.

Tuesday, September 06, 2005

You're PG...Great I'm Not!

So I'm getting good at hearing the news that others in my life are pregnant for the thousandth child while I'm still looking for a second child and maybe my first without at RE involved. On Sunday, my BIL called and talked to DH. His wife is pregnant, with their third child no less. I think I took the news very well, other than the thoughts in my head of "why not me?" As well as thinking who else is left in my life to say their pregnant like the lady who sits next to me or my hairdresser, because at this point, Phoebe now has 3 more first cousins that will born in the next 9 months. The next of which is in about two weeks. At least I'll have more babies to hold until they start crying.... It is nice to give them back when they cry.

Monday, September 05, 2005

Anastasia, Phoebe's Tooth Fairy

Phoebe lost her two bottom front teeth, one today and one yesterday. She was so excited about losing the first one yesterday she had more energy than usual. One of her new friend's at the new neighborhood told us that there are several tooth fairies and that you get assigned one. Her's is Genivieve. We found out from the note that Phoebe's tooth fairy left that her name is Anastasia. Such a lovely fairy name isn't it? Anastasia left her the note and a Sacagawea dollar coin to start a coin collection.

Tonight Phoebe put the second tooth under her pillow with a letter for Anastasia. One of the things she asked in the letter was where she lives. Phoebe told us in the car ride back from getting ice cream that she wanted to visit her Tooth Fairy. I told her that I thought she lived in Neverland with her friend Tinkerbell, as her new friend says the Tooth Fairies and Tinkerbell are all good friends. Phoebe replied, "Mom, Tinkerbell is not real. She's just from Disney. The Tooth Fairy is real."

I have to post a picture of Phoebe with no bottom front teeth. Just in time too. Our dentist appts are on Wednesday this week. Considering how much the adult teeth have already come in behind where the baby teeth were, I thought the dentist would pull them. Thank God Phoebe saved me some money.

Thursday, September 01, 2005

Infertiles Rock!

I just got back from my regular physical appointment with my PCP. I love this woman! I want her to be my best friend, or at least let me stalk her. Other than their practice being very efficient and on time, she is the most personable woman I know. We both about the same age, maybe she's about 5 years older than me, obviously she is a woman, but she is so cool! Why? Both her kids are from IVF. She doesn't hide it. She knows it's frustrating. She asks all kinds of questions around your life, stress, mental state, etc. We talked about how we gave up on conventional infertility treatments, got a dog, and I'm now seeing an acupuncturist. She totally understood, how cool is that??? She also agreed that the dog was important, as she got a puppy when they found out they needed to go the IVF route. So basically, I want my PCP to be my best friend because she's another rocking infertile, as we all are.

I think also as she's a mom. One of the things we talked about moving and Phoebe going to kindergarten next year is she was talking about networking with other moms, and how important it is for us to all support each other. How cool is that!

So if anyone in Northern DE is looking for a cool primary doctor, send me an email and I'll send her info to you!