Wednesday, January 30, 2008

Anything Can Happen

So I've been pondering yesterday's test along with the news that my favorite Gwen Stefani is pregnant with her second child. This one I'm a bit jealous of and a bit hopeful. I think she is totally awesome, and from yesterday's test I feel anything could happen. I really have no idea why I don't seem to get pregnant on my own. But there is a part of me that thinks if I work hard to be as healthy as possible that it will happen. Of course, the hopeful part of me hopes it happens this month so I won't need to schedule the laproscopy.

I've also been working out every night and eating healthy in order to look good in my swimsuit in Disney - if it's warm enough when we're there for me to wear it. I've lost absolutely no weight whatsoever, but I think my pants are fitting better. I didn't realize until last weekend how big my backside got over the past few months that I've been neglecting my elliptical machine. Last weekend I went out shopping for a pair of jeans. I swear to me trying on jeans is as bad for some people as buying a bathing suit. Mostly because I've got a bit of a booty, but my waist is very narrow. So if I try on jeans that fit my hips, there's a huge gap at my waist. If I try anything smaller, it's impossible to get on over my derriere. I know I should just go to the Victoria's Secret website and order the jeans I like, but I've been interested in some instant gratification as well as hoping I could fit into a pair of 7 for All Mankind jeans. Maybe in a few weeks - hey do they make maternity jeans???

Tuesday, January 29, 2008

Tubes Clear

Just got back from the doctor where I had the sono-HSG test done. Thankfully, I took an Alieve with my vitamins this morning, so it was not painful. Everything looked good. My tubes are clear, so that is definately not a factor into why I haven't gotten pregnant.

I talked to the doctor about that I won't be able to have the endometrial biopsy this month, as we'll be in Disney on vacation. He said we can still do the laproscopy at the beginning of next month and then do the endometrial biopsy at the end of next month. So basically, if I don't get pregnant this month or next, I'll probably be on injectibles and officially starting this process mid-March.

Thursday, January 24, 2008

IF Testing Update

AF showed up on Monday, but I was so busy on Tuesday I didn't get to call the RE's office until Wednesday. My sono-HSG is scheduled for next Tuesday. I hope I remember to take some pain killers ahead of time. I always forget for those kinds of tests and then it's awfully painful.

Unfortunately, we won't be doing the endometrial biopsy until next month, as I'll be on vacation at Disney for the entire week when we would need to schedule it. I guess it'll just have to wait.

I am curious though if the RE sees anything on the sono-HSG that seems to warrant scheduling the laporoscopy right away if he will schedule that for the following month or not. At the same time, I'd rather us do the laporoscopy right before we start injectibles to make sure everything is nice and clear.

Last night when I was driving Phoebe to her ice skating class she started talking about adoption and how she wants a sister. I asked her "Wouldn't it be nice though if Mommy could have a baby and not have to adopt?" Her exact words I kid you not, "I don't think that's going to happen, Mom." Boy now I know how my dad felt when I was a kid and he was talking about my blonde streak in my hair and how he had that. He wondered out loud if he still had that blonde streak in his brown hair. I said back to him, "Dad, you lost those hairs long ago." Wow! Paybacks are a b(tch.

Tuesday, January 22, 2008

Tagged Your It

SaraS-P at The Island did a mass tagging to list six non important things/habits/quirks about myself. I usually hate these things, but since I always feel like a mass of quirks and odd habits, I'll take this one on.

The Rules:
1) Link to the person that tagged you.
2) Post the rules on your blog.
3) Share six non-important things/habits/quirks about yourself.
4) Tag at least three people at the end of your post and link to their blogs.
5) Let each person know they have been tagged by leaving a comment on their blog.
6) Let the fun begin!

1. I do not like odd numbers. I try to leave my email box at an even number of emails left in the inbox. I always leave the volume on the TV on an even number. I was very happy when my daughter was born on 10/6/2000 instead of on the 5th when my water broke.

2. I love the Muppets and anything Jim Henson related. DH and DD share this obsession. We are the Muppet family.

3. I have my nose and navel pierced, but my ears are only pierced once. When I was a teenager and having your ears pierced several times was all the rage, I was afraid of the pain. After 21 hours of labor with DD with no pain meds, I figured I could handle anything and the additional piercing started. Nothing is making me interested in getting my ears pierced again. Maybe I will when DD does. She would like another hole in her ears any day now.

4. The number four key on my Apple laptop doesn't work. Whenever I need one, I copy and paste it from somewhere else. DD borrowed my computer once when she went to DH's work for the day and she spilled Vitamin Water on my keyboard. It's the only thing broken from this incident. Someday I'll send it in to get fixed, but I can't live without my computer.

5. I'm obsessed with Bridget Jones Diary and Gone with the Wind fan fiction. I look for new ones on the fan fic website every day. When there is a new one or an update to one I'm crazy about, I get a nice cup of tea and curl up on the couch to read blissfully.

6. I love to sing in my car at the top of my lungs. My singing is also really eclectic. Everything from Green Day and Nine Inch Nails to the Carpenters and Bee Gees. I only don't like country music. My DD and I are also known for singing parts from Mozart's the Magic Flute in the car when we are alone. The Queen of the Night songs in particular. We find it very entertaining.

Hmmm who to tag. I'll have to pick Trace at One Hardy Swimmer since I know she reads my blog regularly (she also needs to keep her mind off the two week wait) as well as Loren at Baby Wait (she needs something to think about other than her beta numbers - and please stop by to congratulate her).

By the way, as expected AF showed up yesterday. I need to call the RE's office to schedule my sono-HSG and endometrial biopsy this month. Hopefully, the vacation won't interfere with any of those dates. It might for the biopsy. If so, it'll just have to wait until next month, because I refuse to reschedule vacations around this time of IF work.

Saturday, January 19, 2008

That B)tch Hope

As I get closer and closer to AF being due for her visit, I must admit that Hope lurks around every corner even though there should be no hope this month. Phoebe was in the hospital when I was ovulating this month, and we no where came close to doing the deed until several days after we were all home. Of course, the brain has to think "Wouldn't it be so nice to accidentally get pregnant now that we had our consult with the doctor to begin our third try?" "Wouldn't it be so nice to cancel the running of all those annoying tests and laproscopic surgery I'm going to need before we start Follistim injections again????" I'm due at least by next Wednesday and it usually shows up a few days early, so I'll know soon.

Wednesday, January 16, 2008

Random Thought

So I get this gossip magazine, I think it's called OK. I never asked for it or paid for it, but it's been coming for well over a year now. I have to admit I love reading it when I'm on the elliptical machine at home. There's this picture and poll question that I had to laugh at. The poll question was "Which Friend has the Better Butt?" and proceeds to have a picture of both Jennifer Aniston and Courtney Cox from the backside when they are in bikinis. I don't even remember what the poll % we're for both, because I laughed as both of them have better butts than I'll ever have!!!

Just waiting these days for AF to show up so I can schedule tests with the RE.

Tuesday, January 15, 2008

All Reality, All The Time

So with the writer's strike, all that is really on TV is reality TV shows these days. I'm starting to watch things that I never would have watched before and I'm starting to enjoy it. Take last night for example. I'm currently amused by American Gladiator. We watched it last night with Phoebe, since it was on at an early time. Of course it was right up her alley and she loved it. She loved it so much I made sure she promised me that she would never try to play this with her friends and I pointed out all the safety gear they have on that isn't available in our play stuff. I have to admit I was cheering for the soccer mom/fitness model that got the best time ever on The Eliminator. She was pretty cool.

I'm feeling a bit better about work today. I'm energized and ready to tackle lots of problems, issues and tasks! I woke up really early this morning and went straight to the shower. So here I am early at work and roaring to go.

Monday, January 14, 2008

Feeling Overwhelmed

Having a definate Monday here! Work is stressing me out, which is not good because my lower back is killing me! There's just so much to get done and I feel like I'm never going to get at the bottom of it. I'm trying to remind myself to keep plugging away and it'll get done.

Last night I finally was able to juice up the flat of wheatgrass I ordered from Harvest Market. I did make sure I had a shot this morning and I've been freezing it into one ounce ice cube to thaw every morning. Now if I could just eat a healthier breakfast in the morning!!!

On the other hand, I made a good purchase yesterday. It's a cellulite cream from Clarins. On top of the exercising, I'd really like to not notice the cellulite on my butt when we go to Florida in February.

Oh I didn't mention that yet? We're going to Disney for the week of February 11th! DH won an award at work and they are paying for him and I to go to a Disney resort, so our plane tickets and three days of the hotel are paid for! We're taking Phoebe out of school for the week so she can go to Disney for the first time. We're paying for her plane ticket and three nights at the hotel before his awards convention. I will need to use hotel babysitting services for three of the nights when I have to go to these dinners with DH. Has anyone ever used Disney resort hotel babysitting services? I would have to think they should be great. I'm going to call the hotel in the next day or two to talk to them about it.

And to answer Trace's question, it took three IUIs to get pregnant with Phoebe, but remember I was on Follistim injections to have lots and lots of eggs. The first month I overstimulated and was a mess, the second we got pregnant but it was a blighted ovum (aka the baby part never developed) and the third time was the charm.

Wednesday, January 09, 2008

Phoebe Was in the Hospital

Phoebe was admitted to the hospital on Saturday night with an infection on a cut on her had that had gotten into her blood. She was put on IV antibiotics and was released to come home yesterday afternoon. It turns out from the test results that finally came in on Monday afternoon that the infection was from the strain of Strep that causes Strep throat. So basically, she probably put her fingers in her mouth when she had this cut and it got infected. This is my cautionary tale - make sure your kids wash their hands often (I know she doesn't) and try to remind them to keep their hands away from their mouth as they get older. Phoebe has a habit of putting her hands up to her mouth when she is acting shy or nervous.

She's doing great now and did go to school today. Saturday she was lethargic and had developed a fever in the afternoon (104!) along with the swelling in her finger and the red streaks that went up her arm to her elbow. I wasn't that nervous on Saturday as I knew she just needed IV antibiotics and she would be OK. Sunday I got nervous because her hand looked worse and the red streaks were still there. The doctors were even talking about maybe changing her antibiotics depending on how the test results came out on Monday. Monday was the turnaround day. She was doing well, no fever, the swelling came down and the test results showed that she was on the right antibiotic. Yesterday she was back in full active mode, her hand wasn't swollen at all and she was discharged in the afternoon.

On the IF front, we did go see the RE on Monday morning, as his office is right next door to the hospital. Next month will be a diagnostic month, doing a sono-HSG and endometrial biopsy. DH will have an SA done anytime within the next month. After that, I'll be scheduled for a laporoscopy (probably in March) and then we'll follow with ovulation induction and insemination (OI/IUI).

For those that have asked, this is how we got all three pregnancies - one resulted in Phoebe and I've had two miscarriages (one was a blighted ovum and one we lost the heartbeat at 10 weeks). I've never gotten pregnant without the doctor's help but there is no real reason other than endometriosis and possibly low progesterone at the end of my cycle.

I might not have been as good taking care of myself while Phoebe was in the hospital, but I wasn't too bad. The mung beans and rice that I mentioned I had made is also known as kitchari. There are some good recipes for it on the Yoga Journal website. Mung beans and rice are supposed to be a good cleansing food to have as it is very gentle on the digestive tract and is packed with vitamins and protein. I've learned to love the smell of the spices I put in my kitchari. It's very comforting.

Oh also, my mom went to her favorite fortune teller and she said that I would have a boy that would be very scientific and he would either be conceived in March or born next March. She also said that the girl I have already is very artistic (duh!). I don't know if I believe in her per se, but it was neat to hear.

Friday, January 04, 2008

Intelligent Kid Questions

I love it when my daughter asks such intelligent, thoughtful questions. This morning she asked one when the news was on while we were getting ready (I've banished morning cartoons - she can watch the news while getting dressed). The Today show was talking about the Iowa primaries and somehow the cost of campaigning came up. Phoebe asked me if you have to pay to vote. What an interesting question to come up! I explained that we don't have to pay to vote that it's free for all citizens, but how if you want to run for political office that you need to money to campaign for that office for advertising on TV, newspapers, and for the cost of your travel and to pay the staff that works for you campaigning and such. She seemed to get it, so at the age of seven she understands more about the political process than I did. Love it!

We've also talked lately about how women didn't always have the right to vote and how that only changed a little over 80 years ago. She was shocked that women couldn't always vote. It was so cute. We're reading "Little Women" right now and night and it's a great opportunity to talk about how things were different for women back in the Civil War times.

Things are going well on my resolutions. I worked out last night, made a pot of mung beans and rice and only had one cup of coffee this morning (and it was the smallest size from the coffee shop, not one huge cup of coffee). I also got some updates to our home calendar and was able to fix my Treo calendar syncing with the one at work. We have a bunch of things I want to get done this weekend. Unfortunately one of them is getting a new battery for DH's car tonight. Last night when he was going to an alumni board meeting, he had to wait for me to get home so he could take my car. His wouldn't start and it seems to be the battery, which would make sense as it hasn't been replaced in years and we are in the middle of a cold snap here on the East coast that would cause it to act up.

Hope everyone has a great weekend!

Thursday, January 03, 2008

It's Getting Better All the Time

Bracelet firmly affixed to my right wrist, I've had some ups and some downs over the last 24 hours. I try to remind myself that every moment may have it's challenges and that any little setbacks can be moments of opportunity to release the guilt, as overall things are getting better all the time. Here's the rundown:

- Updside - Made a great dinner last night - stir-fry chicken and vegetables with brown rice
- Downside - Left work late, so DH was cranky about my wanting to make dinner my way because he was hungry. I made dinner in less than 1/2 hour, so I'm not that sympathetic with his complaining
- Upside - Had kitchen cleaned, laundry started, kid bathed and in bed at a decent time last night.
- Upside - Took my vitamins and exercised on the elliptical machine last night
- Downside - Fell asleep on the couch in my upstairs sitting room. Need to do better on getting to bed at a decent time at night.
- Upside - Packed a healthy lunch and snack last night and put it in the fridge
- Downside - Forgot to take the lunch as I was rushing out the door, but I still made a healthy choices for lunch from the cafeteria (soup and salad) and will get a yogurt from the first floor cafe on the way to the Girl Scout meeting this afternoon.
- Small downside - I did allow myself one cup of coffee this morning from the cafe at work. Tomorrow if I need it, I'll order it 1/2 decaf.

BTW, the upside/downside stuff is all not just infertility related. In the next few days I'll have a very Bridget Jones like post of all the things I'm resolving in the new year to be better on top of.

Wednesday, January 02, 2008

Infertility Thread



I got my bracelet quite sometime ago, but I haven't had the guts to put it on. More because I knew when I put it on would be when I would be committing once again to having another child. When I say committing I mean getting rid of the junk food, eating healthy, exercising, taking my vitamins and supplements regularly and kicking the coffee habit and curbing my love of a good chocolate martini.

Well, I'm doing it. If I'm going back to the RE next Monday, I need to clean up my act once again. I'm not going to do this halfheartedly, but throw my full self into this compelling need I have to have a baby. I get lots of motivation by reading infertility blogs, so I'll be back reading and commenting with a passion. I've also had my last cup of joe this morning and will go back to my one cup of green tea in the AM and herbal teas during the day. It's a struggle with the lovely coffee shop downstairs, but I want to know the joys of having more little feet to pitter patter around the house.

Thank you so much fellow IF bloggers out there for being my inspiration. I'll be keeping you all updated.

Happy New Year

I'm back at work from vacation and this year will be very interesting. Starting today, I will have two people reporting to me, so I'm a boss now! I'll never forget Phoebe's words when she found out DH was a boss, "Daddy has and boss and he is a boss?" Yes, sweetheart, welcome to middle management.

Also we'll be going back to the doctor's and I'm excited to get started on working to have a baby this year. Phoebe was playing with our friend's 15 month old daughter on New Year's Eve and it was so cute!!! She was very loving and age appropriate it brought tears to my eyes. We also woke up on New Years Day to our daughter and friends two kids waking us up. DH starting acting goofy with them as soon as they woke him up. He told me later how great it was waking up like that and that it reminded him of the things that him and his brothers and sisters used to do to wake up their parents on holiday time. Did I ever mention that my DH was one of eight kids in his family? It was nice to have this conversation and realize that DH really does want more kids, but hates putting the pressure on me because he loves me so much and hates to see me hurting. We both agreed that we would be over the moon if we could have boy-girl twins to have one of each quickly. We'll see what happens. A healthy baby is what we look forward to most though.