Crazy Thoughts Go Away

So for those of you who fought infertility and were successful thus far, have you thought about having more children? Do you get that weird pang inside when you see a baby of "Ooooo - maybe I should try again?" If you heard that someone was doing IVF with your RE and they were paying extra to have an outside lab select the gender, would that give you pause to think about trying again. Especially, if it would be nice if you had "just one more daughter". And yes, I did hear this recently from the lady going through IVF with my RE that they are doing gender selection. She has two daughters and never had a son, so they are trying for a boy. I would've thought they wouldn't do that for ethics reasons, but for some reason it is OK. I don't know if I would ever really decide to do something like that if we had a chance, but I know DH really wanted another daughter when we had the twins (he really wanted boy/girl twins), Phoebe would love to have a sister (until she starts going into her makeup, LOL) and when I smell a sweet baby head, I think it would be nice.

But let's get back to reality here..... I've had more IVFs than I can count to have the three children I currently have. I have had three miscarriages and two pregnancies, resulting in three children, two of which had a long stay in the NICU (5-6 weeks) because for both pregnancies, I get PROM (Premature Rupture of the Membranes), which they say if it happens once it will happen again. Gee, I had that happen 4 weeks early with Phoebe and 9 weeks early with the boys. I'm pretty sure it will happen if I get pregnant again and I don't think I want to test that theory and bring another premature child into this world. Plus the hormones from IVF suck. I think I've done my duty of bringing a number of our fabulously gorgeous and intelligent children into this world, so I should be able to be done. I do also think when I look at my family and contiplate our family structure that we are complete. I guess I could tell Phoebe she'll get a little sister if her brothers marry women that aren't 9 years their senior!


Queenie. . . said…
This made me laugh. I was just telling my husband yesterday that I couldn't imagine how anyone with twins decides to have another child, with all of the chaos! You are brave to even let the thought enter your mind!
Mandy said…
I have the same thoughts! What's a few thousand dollars??? I desperately want to have more children. It often makes me feel selfish. There's just something about babies...

But then reality comes creeping back. I can't imagine how a baby (or babies) would fit into our family. Where would they sleep?! And more importantly, I'm not ready for a mini van!
well, I won't act on it either but I had some crazy thoughts this weekend.

The kids are just SO CUTE at the moment; I could have more just for this stage. Because this is what I pictured when I thought of children - the talking and the cuteness. Oh my!

Then I remember not sleeping for 10 months and I screech back to reality. Then again, what's 10 months in the grand scheme of things? I joke!!!
April said…
We have some embryos on ice and I think about them a lot. I feel like we've hit the kid jackpot right now, though and worry that if we have another child we're really tempting fate! :( I also have the problem of not being able to think in the singular. I asked B the other day where we would put 2 more kids. He said, "they don't always come in 2's" :)

Okay, I'll admit that I loved the hormones.

We don't think of having any more kids...we also don't have any embryos left, but still...our take is that we don't want to tempt fate.

I certainly would not allow gender to become an issue if I wanted another child though...just wouldn't happen. Does it make me judge-y if I consider that arrogant after all that we've gone through?

I love Queenie's comment, BTW...I think about that all the time! Why do people do this more than once!?!

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